Wednesday, October 24, 2007

Universally Funny

As You may or may not know.I have started doing Standup Comedy gigs.I have 2 under my belt so far.A full house at the C.C.A in Sauchihall street Glasgow and a 400 seat capacity House at the Motherwell Civic Center.Can i just say i was Fecking Magic.I loved every moment of it and so did the audiance.Here is a Caricature of some of the people involved.Each one has an Amazing talent and its a pleasure to know each and every one of them.

Tuesday, August 28, 2007

WHATS BEEN HAPPENING TO ME

Ah so your Back well ...This is what happened while you were away. Well.I'm glad you asked.Its been a fun time I performed my first standup on the sixth of June,I was at the BBC FOR 4 NIGHTS and I'm just about to change my job....So as i write im unemployed but when i wake up i better remember and turn left at the first roundabout in the morning or I'll have"Fucked up "as we say here in Scotland.Oor Chelle has moved oot,Oor Dana is in Africa studying stripy Mice "I know ...what a swizz" and Oor Shannie is doing just Fine.So's the wife. Heres an unconnected Pattoon for you guys.Oh and my wee Film.Hope you like it..if the films not there its because its taking too long to upload.If it is there please ignore that last sentence.If the film is there did you enjoy it?If so why not comment and pander to my egotistical wee self

Friday, August 10, 2007

Im Still Alive



How dee dooo dee....Flimflamers and Shifty types.Im still alive and hopefully i will get back into the swing of blogging again.Heres some pics since i have been away.

Wednesday, April 18, 2007

Mr Brown The Money Clown


Ah so your Back well ...This is what happened while you were away.So Labour have messed up again.Inflation is at a 10 year high.Interest rates are expected to rise agin later in the month.Our pensions have been raided by about 20%.They plan to spend £30 BILLION on Nuclear weapons........and these diddies are trying to tell the Scottish people that the S.N.P Will cost every family a huge sum of money.Dont believe them and dont vote for them.

Tuesday, April 17, 2007

ChRIS Harkins not Hawkins


Chris Harkins....not Hawkins,Hes that wee robotic guy who talks like a calculator.

Thursday, April 12, 2007

Not Long Now


Not long now till Blair and his Muppets are relieved of thier grip on us.Lets hope the country Remembers all the skull duggery that these guys have got up to and vote this Plamph out...Please.

Wednesday, April 11, 2007

Bastards and Dick Dasters In My WORK


This fucked up place is gonny make me flip.I work with in the majority but not on the whole a bunch of backstabbing sweety wives,Who i would rather not have to spend the time of day with but have to to earn crust.Some of the guys are Magic.I would do anything for Others i would rather throw jobbies at on thier wedding day.
I think its just me.Am i one of the few Sain people who could'n't give a fuck whos sleeping with who,who said what about who...etc..etc...Well am I.I dont know but i will say.This year my Christmas card list(If i had one)would be very short this coming year.
These Bastards make me want to Flip.....................................
So I HAVE DECIDED TO GIVE A RUNNING COMMENTRY OF WHOS SAYING WHAT TO WHO.JUST TO LET YOU GUYS UNDERSTAND HOW FUCKED UP OUR DEPARTMENT IS .NAMES WILL NOT BECHANGED TO PROTECT THE FUDDS.

Fucked over by a Friend


Last week i gave this Drawing (free )to a Friend,who happens to be my boss(Whatever that is?).This week he desides to grass me up for taking a dig at a fucked up little bawsack that works in my Department.This Redheaded fuckup thinks its ok to fuck me up to cover his own back.Well Hell slap it into you.I HOPE IT WAS WORTH IT.I also hope your next shite is a hedgehog and that your finger goes through the bogroll every time you use it.

What do you guys think ?Has this guy done the right thing by covering his back,Or is he a fucked up turncoat bastard who deserves to get some awful ailments? YOU DECIDE.
Oh by the way the Drawing is of his late father in law.I did it to give his wife some comfort in her time of need.I have one of my own Father and it brings me a little reminder of him.

Monday, April 09, 2007

LABOUR

Is it just me?Or can you smell GAS!
Its nearly Time for the Scottish Parliament Election.So Remember all the "GOOD DEEDS CARRIED OUT IN YOUR NAME BY THE lABOUR pARTY".

1 .Bullying and abusing The Parents and Children Of our Local school.

2 .Mr Brown Stealing a share of your Pension.

3 .Starting a War killing 10s of Thousands of People on the strength of a Lie.

4 .Just for being more Tory and Nazi like than Adolf Thatcher.

PLEASE ,PLEASE,PLEASE DONT VOTE LABOUR

What a Fecking big Flag

Hs anyone ever been to Aquaba in Jordon.I was there a few weeks ago.They have what i thought was the biggest flag in the world but i was wrong.This Fecking big Huge flag the size of a block of flats was the bloody winter flag...Apparently the summer flag is even bigger.You have to take my word for it though cos i cant upload the pictures of it cos im a bit thick.

Franks Doo


I was lucky enough to recieve an invitation to the Social event of the Coatbridge callender.Yes it was Frank Kelly's 65th Birthday party ,held in the exclusive St Patricks,Chapel Hall,Coatbridge.It was a rare night,Singers galore and good fun had by all.Heres my Gift to our Frank....Lets have many more.

Pattoon below

Fat Man Faints


I fainted in work last month....What a laugh.It turns out Fat though i am i dont eat enough Mars Bars....My blood sugar level dropped below 4 and i hit the floor.Luckily these two guys in green came to save the day and wisk me away to hospital for a wee checkup.Incidentaly this is where some mad women did a forty year old virgin job on my Hairy chest so she could hook me up to that beepy machine.So as a thankyou i gave the guys a Charicature of themselves.Heres the wee thing here....So if you are nice to me i might give you a free Charicature....If your nasty i moght not..

Easter was Shit


Easter was shit.......I only got one egg and had to work....So Easter was Shit but Christmas was fine.Heres a couple of old girls im thinking of doing a cartoon script aboot ....What do u guys thunk Hmmmmmmmmmm...

Monday, January 15, 2007

MY MATE REBECCA


There is a special kid in the sunny glasgow town of Blairdardie.She is funny,lovely,magic and my wee mate.She is one of the best pranksters i have seen in my long time on this planet.Shes hid in a bin to scare old folk,Shes been party to flicking peanuts into the cleavage's of a couple of floosis that came to see her brother and she nearly poisioned a drunk women at a candle party by giving her straight cordial instead of white wine,someone convinced her that she may have accidentaly killed her.....for that i apologise.All i wanted to say is she is a Gem.
Patt