MY MATE REBECCA

There is a special kid in the sunny glasgow town of Blairdardie.She is funny,lovely,magic and my wee mate.She is one of the best pranksters i have seen in my long time on this planet.Shes hid in a bin to scare old folk,Shes been party to flicking peanuts into the cleavage's of a couple of floosis that came to see her brother and she nearly poisioned a drunk women at a candle party by giving her straight cordial instead of white wine,someone convinced her that she may have accidentaly killed her.....for that i apologise.All i wanted to say is she is a Gem.
Patt

Im still here,Are you still reading Pattoons?

Sorry for not posting lately.I hope to pick up the pace of my Blog again and fill your worlds with joy.

REAL RADIOS FOOTBALL PHONE IN

Ifound this picture of Alan Rough and Ewan Cameron in a compromising position..........Who says young men cant have fun together without being gay....hmmmm who says that,I dont know.

TONY BLAIR

Squaters rights for Tony Blair cos the mass murdering muppet is due for the boot but like most polititions he just wont fuck off when you want him too.

HALLOWEEN

And the joke goes........

A rangers fan walking his 3 legged dog finds a magic lamp after polishing it clean.A genie pops out the genie goes through the old you can have 1 wish routine.......The Rangers fan says...after thinking for a few minuets..." I would like my dog to win the Grand National by 4 lengths and to be crowned Miss world and shit gold bars ,every day.".......

The genie looks at the dog and after thinking he says
"look you nonse im a fucking genie not God,You stoater.....try again you plank."He then slaps the fool.

The Rangers fan thinks on...."Ah...i know i would like Rangers to win the Champions League."

The Genie thinks on for a moment ....and says.

" What was the wish about the Dog again".

SORRY I MISSED THE BUS

I DO APOLOGISE FOR NOT POSTING LATELY ,I MISSED THE BUS.

NOT REALLY I,VE JUST BEEN VERY BUSY.....SLEEPING MOSTLY. AS I SAY I DO APOLOGISE AND NORMAL BLOGGING WILL BE RESUMED AS OF NOW.

so as a treat heres an old favorite my gift to stewart philps and my first attempt at animation.........Enjoy...Oh and remember to visit
For a solution to your problems ...well maybe not but you should have a wee laugh if nothing else.

MEET MR DOOLEY

the world,mr dooley.mr dooley the world.

PATTAGONY THE PROBLEM SOLVER

VISIT http://pattagony.blogspot.com
Here you will find the elixsor to all you ills.
Here you will find the answer to the problem you did'nt know you had.
Here you will find the inept dribblings of a once handsome man,now ravaged by time and fate.
Here you will find the knower of the answer of the problem that torrments your every waking moment.
Here you will find a prophet of guidance.
Here you will find the dirty secrets of your closest friends.
Here you will find a 20pence piece....maybe...most likely not.
Here you will find a twisted wreck of a man,spilling his crazed mind out on the floor for all to see.
Here you will find a little chuckle.

If not ...........Piss off,Gone get,On yer toes ya mank....oh and make sure the door disney hit you on the arse on the wiy oot......Ya footer.

Only kidding...Just leave a comment and we will find a solution.Not necessarilly the one for your problem but you might have a wee laugh.

IAN JENNINGS

I thought your boy would like this Ian.

Even Einstien canny figure it out

.
Have you tried to post a letter these days with the new pricing system.Whit a nightmare.so they are priced by size of envelope,with of envelope,colour of envelope,destination,bra size of person recieving it.Height of postman required to deliver it.The amount of dogs in the street its to be delivered to and of course the shoe size of your granny.What a nightmare.I guess everyone will be the same as me.Just pop a wee first class stamp on everything and pop it in the post and hope for the best.If you have any problems with this formula go to http://pattagony.blogspot.com
Where im sure this and all your other problems will be solved by your free agony aunt service to theBloggers of the world.

Glasgows anti war coalition

I have allowed the use of this Cartoon for the fight against the Isreali war.Hopefully they will use it to highlight Scotlands opposition to the ongoing conflict.

THOSE DIRTY WARMONGERING BASTARDS

So America has been using our airport at Preswick to refuel thier planes full of bombs that are being used to kill Civillians and the odd terrorist in Lebanon and the gazza strip.Fuck that says Scotland and break into thier plane looking for bombs.they even sat in the cockpit.I on the other hand would have shat in the cockpit (that would slow the fuckers down a bit).So to make the place more secure i hear they have put up the odd warning sign and repaired the fence.This did'nt work as they got in again...Fantastic.Mr Bush keep the fuck out iof our free world you evil little man.

GRANNY

Grannies eyesight had gotten so bad this was the third time this week she had taken her ned grandson out for walkies instead of the dog.He did,nt mind the walk but he hated when Granny insisted hes did a pooh outside which she would lift up in a wee plastic bag.It was worse if he shat in someones garden bacause she would rub his wee Ned nose in it and make him sleep in the Garden.

SACRE BLUE

MORE FUN FROM THE FAT ONE

The French Revolution has begun at Castle Ibrox and as far as we can see its is Pish.VEV LA POOR QUALITY TEAM.

TOONS OF MINE FOR YOUR PLEASURE...ENJOY

LEX finally gets a Pattoon

Enjoy Lex